Protein Pancake Series: Updated Birch Benders Review

Pandemic or not, I’ve been eating a fair amount of protein pancakes. Sometimes the commute from my bed to my desk seems insurmountable and then fast, delicious protein pancakes are the way to go. 

Before I met my favorite protein pancakes – Kodiak Cakes, my jam was Birch Benders. I gave them a 9/10 at the time and described their mouthfeel as “sweet fluff and protein fairies dancing on the tongue.”

I thought they missed the mark (egregiously) with their instant Keto Cup Pancakes, and gave them the harshest TastyStacks rating of Not Pancakes. But I still assumed their regular protein pancake mix, my old tried and true, were reliably delicious.

I tried them side by side with Kodiak Cakes for a real-time comparison. I even made the Birch Benders pancake second, giving them the preheated pancake edge. Aesthetically speaking, the Birch Benders pancake looked more golden brown when I flipped it. But that’s where the positives stopped.

They were fine, kind of. If our definition of “fine” means unfluffy pancakes that do not make my mouth happy. They were more dense than Kodiak Cakes, which are perfectly fluffy every time. Their texture paled in comparison.  They were dry and disappointing. I ended up freezing the Birch Benders pancake for some day when I’ve run out of Kodiak Cakes at the same time as a zombie apocalypse and really need an emergency pancake. 


JUST THE STACKS – 5/10 TASTY STACKS  

Overall Taste: Dry and flat and boring but not terrible.

Mouthfeel: Disappointing. I cheered myself up making pancake fruit faces. Cute, right?

Protein per serving: 16g

Carbs per serving: 26g

Price:  $4+ per box

Available at: Birch Benders and Amazon. But I suggest Kodiak Cakes instead.

Protein Pancake Series: Flapjacked

The Banana Hazelnut flavor is excellent, it’s slightly sweet and slightly nutty (much like myself).

Flapjacked was the first protein pancake brand I discovered when looking for something better than my two ingredient egg & banana pancakes. A lot of people rave about egg and banana pancakes and while it’s nifty you only need two ingredients for them, I need that perfect pancake fluff. 

Along came Flapjacked! They started off strong, with a great name, emphasizing the “Jacked” in their logo. Their mix doubles as a baking mix and I have made some delicious protein donuts from them. (You have to think about them as protein donuts and not real donuts, otherwise you’ll be disappointed.)

All you need to add to the mix is water, but you can use an egg or milk instead. Versatile! I have fond memories of making these in my tiny basement apartment in Boston especially during the occasional snow day. Snow day pancakes are a delight best experienced and not described. 

Flapjacked was my favorite until I discovered Birch Benders, which I find to have a bigger fluff factor. I recently tried the Flapjacked mix again in the name of pancake research. Also, Birch Benders doesn’t have a Banana Hazelnut flavor (hint, hint).

Half a cup gives you 20g of protein, which is plenty, unless you want to make a giant pancake. Then you need a full cup and an activity planned to put all that protein to good use. I used the Banana Hazelnut flavor and added chocolate chips. Flapjacked also has Buttermilk, Carrot Spice, and Cinnamon Apple mixes in addition to a line of Mighty Muffins, Protein Cookie Mixes, and Cookie Bars.

My pancake was not as giant as I would have liked, but that’s hardly a criticism. The Banana Hazelnut flavor is excellent, it’s slightly sweet and slightly nutty (much like myself). It’s also slightly grainy, so if you don’t like that in pancakes you might not love this mix. They’re fluffy, but Birch Benders still exceeds them in the fluff factor. Something about the texture didn’t thrill my mouth, but overall Flapjacked is a solid and sturdy choice for a protein pancake mix.

JUST THE STACKS – 7.5/10 TASTY STACKS  

Overall Taste: Slightly sweet, nutty, & grainy. Good but not outstanding.

Mouthfeel: Something was a little off in this department.

Protein per serving:  20g per 1/2 cup.

Price: $6.99 – $12.99

Available at: Amazon, the Internet at large, grocery stores.

Nighthawk Returns…Or Does It?

If you’ve ever thought you could lay your head on a soft stack of perfectly shaped pancakes, these would be it.

After my disastrously disappointing Nighthawk experience, I wasn’t sure when I’d be ready to go back. The opportunity presented itself to me in an unlikely way. To make an awkward story short, a guy came up to me at a show, introduced himself, and asked me out for pancakes. He was wearing shoes and everything so I said yes. Then he suggested…Nighthawk.

Before I broke up with Nighthawk, I would have agreed instantly. Was I ready to go on another date and have more sad, deflated pancakes? Even if the guy was wearing shoes? I decided that yes, this would be a good opportunity to see if my previous experience was more of a fluke than a regular thing. Sure, it helped that the guy was cute too.

I told my date about my previous disheartening Nighthawk experience, which heightened the pancake anticipation. What would the Big Bird and Short Stack be like this time? Would I get heaven cooked in batter form or a sad stack of mediocrity?

I was dumbfounded when the pancakes arrived. They were large and fluffy, with crispy fried chicken on top. If you’ve ever thought you could lay your head on a soft stack of perfectly shaped pancakes, these would be it. They looked like an old love returned to me, but I was suspicious. 

I usually refrain from taking food photos on a first date, but I couldn’t help myself this time. This was a good looking stack that needed to be documented. Luckily, my date was similarly photographically inclined. We proceeded to engage in an eye-rolling, “very LA” display of food photography.  

I couldn’t get over how perfectly sized and fluffy these pancakes looked compared to last time. As I usually do, I tried them without butter or syrup first to determine their natural mouth feel. They were good, but the magic was gone for me. Even after adding syrup and butter, I just wasn’t getting that surge of exploding pleasure. And the butter Nighthawk uses is fucking delicious. The fried chicken was also good, it was substantially crispier and more flavorful than last time. 

Unfortunately, the X factor that pushed these into a 10/10 rating previously was missing. Once your pancake crush crushes you, there’s just no going back (though you’ll notice these are still rated highly).  This is sad, but there are other pancakes out there. I know, I already found them

JUST THE STACKS – 8.5/10 TASTY STACKS

Overall Taste: Pretty good, objectively tasty, but not outstanding.

Mouthfeel: Fluffy & pleasant.

Size: Perfect.

Presentation: Really fucking good looking.

Price: $17

Location: 417 Washington Blvd, Venice, CA 90292